you win some, you lose some

Brian and I thought it would be appropriate to make a pit-stop in the Fort during our travels to Austin for Engagement Party Weekend, so we pitched it to my mom as an early Thanksgiving (2 birds 1 stone, bitches). Our three days in the Metroplex were noteworthy, as is becoming typical now that JTF is in the picture.

Let me go ahead and say that this is one of the nicest men I have ever met. He is very dedicated to my mom and, by default, is committed to building a relationship with myself and Brian. For a future stepfather, these are really great qualities. Moving on...

So, JTF invited Brian, my mom, and I over to his place to watch some of their weekly TV shows. B and I had never seen his house, so this was the first time we'd gotten a glimpse of JTF's Life, versus JTF in My Mom's Life. Seeing as how he's trying to become a part of the family, I imagine this was an important moment for him. So we arrive, take our coats off, and linger awkwardly around the couch waiting to see who will sit where. JTF flips on the TV.

I tilt my head to the side...what is exactly is that on the screen? Oh, it's a girl. Aaaaaaaand a penis. It's a girl and a penis. SHIZAM! Fortunately, JTF manages to hit the input button and send that girl and that penis into the confines of blackness. Unfortunately, only a few seconds later JTF hits the input button again and, hooray, they're back! Only now there's another girl in the scene, and she and her boobs are looking to parrrrrty. For the next 11 seconds, JTF misplaces his opposable thumbs and cannot figure out even so much as one. button. to press to make it go away.

And what are we doing this whole time? Well, my mom is laughing so hysterically that she's capsized on the couch. Brian is exhibiting the greatest restraint of all time, mixed with bursts of snarfed laughter. And I am experiencing a real, live heart attack but still manage to say the only words that anyone can squeak out during this excruciating cinematic screening: AT LEAST MUTE IT.

This episode has inspired me to create a new level of Texcellence, appropriately categorized as TeXXXas.

That night after Dave & Buster's (you heard me!), JTF invited us in to watch some more TV. He promised there would be no porn on. Brian said in that case, he might as well go home.

Gotta love it. Now please go re-read the second paragraph :)