my morning with juanita

This morning I woke up to a text from David (one of my bosses) asking if I could get him a smoothie and some construction paper. Slightly odd, considering we're a hedge fund. 

Turns out, a little bitty puppy wuppy followed David home from a walk this morning and wouldn't go away, so he asked me to make some flyers for the neighborhood. 

Then he told me where to go hang the flyers.

Meet my project for the morning: Juanita!

After calling some nearby vets, I learned that the only dog that's been reported Missing is missing an eyeball. Survey says that one's not getting picked up by a stranger.

So I made some cute flyers (it's important that they're cute, right?), drove to his neighborhood, taped them up everywhere, and then went and rescued the little lady from the box that they were keeping her in. FYI, it was a box about 3 feet high and it was tipping back and forth as she sumo-wrestled with herself inside, very reminiscent of the scene in Something About Mary with Puffy behind the bathroom door. And then I looked inside and saw this little tiny ball of cuteness!

Granted I HATE chihuahuas but I think this one might have a little min-pin in her or something, which is slightly redeeming. Also important to note that those ears actually flop over, which makes her look a little more like she's from planet Earth.  

Juanita and I chased some falling acorns for a while (yeah....) and then took what I'm assuming was her first car ride, weeeeeeeeee. We went to the vet to scan her for a microchip but apparently she's too young for one :( The vet told me to post flyers (check) and not put her picture on it (un-check) because people will randomly claim puppies and sell them to experiment labs!!! WTF people?! You better not sell Juanita or I'll cut your cajones off!

I gave David a list of questions to grill anyone who calls in response to the flyer so we make sure they're the real owners, things like "What are Juanita's favorite toys?" (Answer: Acorns) and "What is Juanita's real name?" (Answer: Juanita). 

And yes, I absolutely considered bringing her home but weighed the wrath of Powder and decided that the threat of a white menace dropping turds all over my carpet was too risky. In the meantime, Juanita is back in the box!