the race is on

Sometimes I wonder if my life is so busy because that's just how it is or because that's how I've orchestrated it to be. I literally have 10 e-stickies on my desktop with different to-do lists on them. I have 4 Excel documents that I have to regularly update so I can keep track of my major transactions, records of events, notes on things I need to take care of, research I've done, etc. My Gmail has 45 different labels. Even my Google calendar has to be separated into 7 different colors just so I can keep tabs on everything. IS THIS NORMAL?

Truthfully, most of my life chaos is not worth complaining about. I'm fortunate enough to have a house, which is why I have to F- with tax appraisal protests and maintenance issues. I'm fortunate enough to be able to go to school, which is why I have to juggle assignments, classes, projects, and tuition. I'm incredibly fortunate to be getting married, which is why I have files full of contracts and 2 powerpoints just to organize the photos I've saved. 

So like, I'm not really complaining. Just sharing the overwhelm-ment of my desktop.

Life's current chaos is as follows: while I'm wrapping up my final projects for the semester, we've started demolition on the laundry room at my dad's house, which is the only major work that we will do now that we decided to put the house on the market. Yay! Don the Realtor is starting with an informal soft-sell and then will list it on MLS, so I'll keep the blog updated if we get any bites. To get to that point, though, means lots of cleaning, yardwork, and appointments with people from pest control, energy audit, A/C service, etc. Brian came back in town (to the rescue) to help juggle the to-do list for this and next week. Everything will come to a blissful, screeching halt next Thursday when I turn in my final paper and we fly to Colorado for a long weekend. E-stickies and e-mail and e-chaos will be temporarily shut down....fantastico! 

to whom it may concern

Dear Person Who Never Replaces the Toilet Paper at Work,

I hate you.

XOXO

LB

honeymoon hunting

Since I blew off the morning and spent the whole time researching honeymoons, I promised myself I'd study after lunch. But here I am. Full, and blogging about honeymooning. 

Brian and I have started gathering our thoughts on potential spots, and let me tell you people something - the world is a very big place. I guess this is traditionally a little too early to be planning that part of Marriage Extravaganza 2K10, but we're really hoping to use some "credit" through a timeshare program that B's parents are a part of, and those places book up ridiculously early, sooooooooo here we are. July and planning 11 months out. 

Costa Rican pool

Really all we have to do now is settle on a spot so we can reserve our lodging, and then we'll work on the rest of it at a more appropriate time, say next spring. But trying to pick a spot is way more overwhelming than I thought it would be! I've found myself spending a lot of time judging pools, when really I want to find a part of the world that's crazycool outside the resort walls. We've really only been able to weed out one place, which is New Zealand, because we want to go in our winter when it's their summer. Otherwise, the rest of our choices are all over the globe right now. Which makes for a menacing Excel sheet. 

Finnish pool

So, five readers, do any of you have any comments on places you've been and loved? I really want to know where and why! Recommendations are so crucial, and I'm hoping maybe I could narrow my focus a little bit with some feedback. I think our trip will span a couple of weeks and hopefully will include lots of disparity - adventure, relaxation, hostels, resorts, whatever. So really the metric is just caliber of amazement and enjoyment. Ok, now go post something helpful :)

God's pool, as seen in the Dominican Republic 

life lately

Life has been rolling right along these past few weeks, so sorry for not blogging but here's what's been keeping me busy:

+ As some of you know, our wedding planner quit! Not because we sucked, fortunately, but because her godsister decided to get married the same day as us. This caused a good solid 24-hour panic for me (I know, dumb), but I met with someone new that fortunately we can actually afford (as most of the experienced planners are a fortune), and it turns out her company works closely with our photographers as well, so now everybody's happy :) Oh, and speaking of our photographers, they are awesome and officially booked as well! They have been so flexible with our budget and our ideas, which are very specific but a little different from what they normally have done. They are open-minded and creative, which is exactly what we want!

+ Classes...still cramping my social life...The good news is, I'm learning a lot about the law. The bad news is, some of my classmates are still idiots. Cest la vie.

+ We opened up a new fund at work, and we're opening another next month! Really this mostly affects really really ridiculously good looking rich people, but it is an exciting chapter for the business and my bosses have been working really hard and deserve to reap some benefits! Consequently, they've been in a great mood, allowing me to pull crap like this: 

Boss 1: Hey, would you mind creating a new folder for this?

Me*: Aaaand cut. Let's do another take, but this time you don't want me to do anything for you. Aaaaand ACTION.

+ Trying to hire contractors for a few/ton of fixes on my Dad's house, including but not limited to a water leak and subsequent mold destruction, bringing the water heater up to code, removing and replacing the stove, laying tile in kitchen and bathrooms, new toilets, and new carpet. Let me tell you how fun this is......oh wait, it's not. We've got it narrowed down to the A-Team (who costs twice as much) and the B-Team, who is keeping plumber's crack alive and well. This has involved a lot of researching, appointments, price checking, etc. Interesting learning experience but I'm definitely ready to get someone hired and get the work done! Not sure if renting or selling will come after that, but I am meeting with my realtor this week to discuss.  

+ Chicago for the Fourth of July. We had a really great weekend , despite that one little glitch where I threw up 15 times after a night of beer die on an empty stomach. (So what if I'm 26?) Beyond that, Brian and I spent some time checking out different neighborhoods so I could get a feel for them...you know...if I moved...or something...sometime. I am so grossly in love with the city right now that I think you could put me in a cardboard box and I'd be happy. Until winter, when I would die. We trekked through Lincoln Square, Roscoe Village, Wicker Park, and Lakeview, and next time will look into more! In the meantime, I've signed up for an 8-hour bicycle safety/maintenance class (shut it) so I can work on not getting killed in traffic, which will be nice to practice here over the next year before I hit the streets of Chicago.

*By me, I mean me as Jim Gaffigan, but if you actually thought I could be that funny, then I love you.

cyber-mom

My mother--who cannot text, can barely attach a photograph in an e-mail, and does not understand the concept of "folders" on your computer--has just joined Facebook. And Twitter. AND WE'RE FRIENDS. 

Is there no sacred ground anymore?

I'm sure some of y'all's parents are already online, but literally my mom doesn't even truly understand what Facebook is. She's only on it because her website person told her she should get on it to promote her new book. I mean, her page is one big oxymoron. She somehow has managed to find 121 friends (WTF?) but she goes back and forth between normal statuses and misplaced wall posts: "Hi Gipper, how are Nancy and Shane? Ree called my mother a week or so ago. She was thrilled." 

I started to explore my new cybermom and looked at her website for the first time in forever to see if she's been updating about her books. In the "Meet Laurie" section there's a little paragraph about her family, so to speak. It includes the cats' names, but not mine. 

I will admit, though...I am starting to enjoy her Twittiness. Right now she has up: "This may be Sunday but it's a work day for me. Off to see patients in the psychiatric ward. It's times like this that I know I'm blessed."

We'll see how our new Internet relationship pans out. She still doesn't know about this blog, and I plan on keeping it a secret until I'm waterboarded.

one...more...day

Why is it that right when a really fun weekend is on the horizon, your to-do list is suddenly overwhelmed with totally obnoxious tasks? As if life tries to offset the caliber of fun you are about to have with an equally hemorrhoidic experience until then. Due to this rule of Life Suckage, Jackie's bachelorette party is being preceeded this week by things like: finding out a water leak has caused much more major structural damage than previously known; going to the gynecologist; having an emotional breakdown; and having to read out the ass for class. Like, so much reading out the ass that I periodically wander around my house (while reading) to change the scenery because I'm that sick of it. As if each new spot I find is a little prize that I get for making it through a few more pages. Because my life is that lame. Which leads to awkward moments where I come out of my read-walking and realize I'm sitting on the edge of my bathtub...or standing in the backyard. 

I guess this annoying crap makes the light at the end of the tunnel even brighter, but you know my priorities are all screwed up when I actually look forward to cleaning out the trunk of my car because it means I can avoid reading that much longer. (Incidentally, God rest the soul of the two-year old granola bar I found under a pair of mesh pantyhose). 

BUT I will say, when 5:00 tomorrow hits and I'm only 2 hours away from Katie's arrival and less than a day away from Jackie's arrival, I am closing those books until Sunday night and thoroughly enjoying every second of the glorious reunion / shitshow that is about to occur! 

a good ole Texas workday

I'm not sure if I've ever fully explained the deal with my job, aside from referencing how awesome it is. Half of it takes place in the office, typical doldrums of helping my bosses stay organized. That's all fine and well - I have a great view of trees and free range on the Internet, so I can't complain. The other part of my job is to manage one boss' family's vacation home, which is on a river about 45 minutes away. It's an incredible piece of property, lots of open ranch-land, huge trees, deer, cows, turkeys, four-wheelers, swimming holes, cliffs, etc., and that's not even touching on the house (and the new addition we just spent the last year building). 

My boss and I go out at least once a month to work on various projects, and sometimes we get distracted. Like a few weeks ago, when I realized someone in the family had put out glue traps to catch field mice in the garage. 

I don't know how much you know about glue traps, but if you've ever put one down, we can no longer be friends. I found the cutest tiniest deadest mouse in one, and while I was standing over him wondering how long it took him to starve to death, I leaned closer and realized his tiny body was hiccuping in an effort to breathe. And then I immediately started crying. Because I am made of fairy dust. 

A rodent control guy was actually at the house then, so I told him he needed to kill the mouse to put it out of its misery. He seemed totally miffed at how to do that (is this not your job?!) and asked if we had a hammer. Disgusting. I went to my boss and told him he had to do something. The poor mouse was dying. IT WAS DYING AND WE WERE WATCHING. 

And that's the day I learned how to shoot a gun.

I'd never fired an actual for-reals gun before, which is shocking considering both my parents were cops. I don't believe Americans should even have the right to carry concealed weapons, so I don't have too much interest in really learning how to use them. Buuuuuut since we had to shoot the mouse anyway....

R.I.P. Mr. Jingles

My mom periodically has to do some kind of testing at the shooting range to renew her handgun license, and she's a perfect shot. Like, perfect beats all the men perfect. So I've kind of wondered about my own skills, especially since I've been blessed with good vision. My boss and I set up some corncobs for targets on the hillside for the lesson. 

For your viewing pleasure, I circled the corn in red. 

The Shot

The Verdict: 

I can kill any ear of corn that tries to come within 100 feet of me.

I'm happy—and a little weirded out—to say this is my greatest personal victory in the last six months or so. And I'm pretty sure my mom got choked up at the good news, which guarantees that she'll be giving me a gun rack for Christmas. Hooray!